Hash and the Tarot Reading

Nick got tarot cards from his cousin for his b-day and no they aren't Hello Kitty tarot cards although that would've been funny and cute...he's supposed to do a reading for me before I go to John's house tonight. Guess what I'll be asking?!

LATER: I fnally went over John's house after nine o' clock and for a while there I thought he was going to bail. But...well you can read the rest...

"Hey how's it goin'? I'm on my way back from work right now...my friend Paul is going through drama with his roommates and his dad right now so he's with me. He's going to try to go to hi dad's a little later apparently, but if that doesn't work out, do you mind if he chills with us tonight? Whether at your pad or mine...

Uhhh, that's fine with me the more the merrier but I have no kitchen were doing construction on the house right now. Can we just hang out at your pad? Oh yeah, I don't have your address text me it again. =)

Sounds like your friend needs a drink or some major pot smoking done, lol.

Ha ha...yeah for sure! 477 Notre Dame Road, Claremont 91711. Ha ha yeah he's smoking now.

Does that mean I should come over now? Oops I mean text me when you're home.

Yeah we just got her you can come over whenever. I'm home. ;)

When I finally got to his house him and his friend were hanging out in John's bedroom so I sat beside his friend on John's bed. The friend was cute, tall and skinny but reminded me of a dull looking, brunette Isaac Nystrom. The three of us started talking about racial profiling, ethnicity, Julian Assange and his rape allegations and then his friend got picked up by his dad and John I were left alone to hang out...

We finished watching Half Baked and then we watched Moon and I'm Not There. And we talked for small increments but mostly I sat on his bed and he sat in his computer chair and we watched these movies...which started to become boring even though we smoked a bunch of bowls.

I finally realized that coming over John's house to watch movies and TV is fucking, boring. I've decided I want to try and get him to go out with me sometime to go grab a beer, you know something that won't make him feel too pressured or whatever...

But see he has the upper hand, he can say no or he who knows what he could or will say.

It's so obvious I like him though and I'm pretty sure he can tell. I made sure that whenever I took his bong or lighter from his hand that our fingers didn't touch (which is odd I know). I was looking at him out of the corner of my eye while we were watching one of the movies and I swore he was staring at me but when I looked up at him and he totally wasn't! Then he caught me looking at him and I turned back to the TV screen and like fixed my hair really quick to make it look like I was doing something else.

I couldn't even muster up the courage to hug him good bye although I wanted too. I would love to hug John or touch fingers whenever I take something from his hand but I can't, not yet at least. I feel different about him than most guys like he's really special or something. I feel almost the same way about John that I used to feel about Isaac my first boyfriend. Which is saying a lot because I really liked Isaac a whole bunch back in the day. He makes me feel really nervous and unsure of myself which is a rareity because I always feel secure 99% of the time around guys.